Have you noticed how some people always seem to have the latest cell phone? Every time a new phone comes out, they want it real bad. Their conversation seems to revolve around what the latest phone is.

Well, I applied my higher powers of reasoning and figured out why these people are so phone-crazy.

It’s obvious. They are aliens.

They use their cell phone to capture all our brain waves. That’s why they are always showing off their phones to other people. When you’re looking at that cool new phone, they’re actually tapping into your sub-conscious.

After some time, the phone’s memory gets full (with all that brain-data), and they need to “upgrade”. Is it a co-incidence that newer phones have more memory? I think not!

The phone manufacturers are alien motherships. They make these phones and distribute it to the other aliens. And because they don’t want people like us to get hold of their brain-wave capturing devices, they make the phones very expensive.

With all this insight, you must have also figured out why the aliens seem to talk so much on their phones. They’re downloading all your brain-data from the phone.

But don’t worry. I’ve figured out a test to check for these aliens. You take something pointy (like a pen or a stick) and poke the person. Preferably behind the ear. If it’s alien, you will see its face mask open and the little green alien will be sitting inside.

Try this the next time you see a person talking excessively on a phone. You’ll see what I mean.

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