I was (un)fortunate enough to be invited to a wedding yesterday. I didn’t even know the guy or the bride. My wife got invited, and I was only tagging along. Anyway, that’s not the story.

It was a reception, and we duly joined the long queue to go on stage to wish the newly wedded couple on their happiest day. Except, it was not their happiest day. The dude looked like he was starving since morning, and his bride looked like she was going to faint. They could barely keep a smiling face for all the uncles and aunties that were supposedly blessing them. After each guest left, someone from the background came in with a glass of water and some paper towels for the two, much like in a tennis match.

Anyway, soon it was our turn to go and greet them. As we walked on stage, the two dutifully put on their fake smile. My wife and I extended our congratulations to them and wished them happiness.

The two of them just nodded. Still smiling, they looked at each other.
Obviously, they had not recognized us.

They must have thought we were some random people who’ve ended up in the wrong hall. My wife was visibly embarrassed. But not me. These kinds of things don’t embarrass me easily. I’m lucky that way.

The four of us were just standing there, looking at each other, hoping someone will do the introductions. My wife gave up at this point and said: “Didn’t you recognize me? I’m from Kumarans, we were in the same class”.

At this point, the light came to him, and he tried to profusely apologize. He also made a shameless attempt at a coverup, saying something about my wife having lost weight and looking much different. We thanked him for inviting us and complimented him(fakely of course, for the sake of symmetry) about how beautiful the wedding looked and walked out of the stage.

Wife: “That was really embarrassing!”
Me: “I wonder what’s for dinner”
Wife: “It was so awkward. How could he not remember me? I was so popular in school!”
Me: “I hope they have South Indian food. It’s really good. He’s from Bangalore, isn’t he?”
Wife: “He said I’m looking ‘very different’. Do you think he meant it in a good way or a bad way?”
Me: “The North Indian buffet will be good too, especially the soups. I wonder who is catering the dinner.”
Wife: “ARE YOU EVEN LISTENING TO ME?”
Me (somewhat stunned): “What? Can you please repeat the question?”

Needless to say, the wife proceeded to hand out a lecture. I think it was something about how marriage is about communication and empathy, but it could also have been about what a jerk I was. The interesting thing, anyway, was that the food indeed was a North Indian Buffet, well worth the Rs 60 I had to shell as entry fee (for the bouquet)