In this post, I’ll share with you some lessons that I recently learnt from the wife, the hard way, about how to successfully carry more than 100 Kgs of stuff back to India from your latest US trip.

Lets say you went on a Shopping Spree when you were in the US, and bought way more stuff than the Airlines will let you carry back. What do you do? For the record, most airlines will allow you 2 bags of 32Kgs each, but what if you’ve bought well over 100Kgs of stuff. What do you do now?

Here are 4 easy steps to getting all that stuff back to India without paying *any* excess baggage fee. All you need is a little bit of cunning and trickery and an unsuspecting husband.

Step 1: Stuff your own bags to the absolute limit.
This step requires some super skills and a total disregard for the laws of Physics. You stuff your bags until they can take no more. Then you stuff them even more. You keep on stuffing until you have enough density to be dangerously close to creating a black hole.

Step 2: Take one of your husband’s bag, throw out his stuff, and then put your own stuff in it.
The key to this step is not letting your husband know that you’ve completely stuffed his suitcase with your stuff. He’s going to have to carry his suitcase when he comes back, so he’ll get all your shopping automatically.

Step 3: Give more stuff to your husband, and ask him to bring it back with him.
The key part in this step is to ask nicely. Say something along the lines of “There’s this tiny-winy little things that are not fitting in my bag, can you bring them back with you? Thanks so much. I promise I’ll make you Alu Paratha if you bring them…“. Another important thing is to “accidentally forget” to mention that you’ve already stuffed one of his bags.

Step 4: Hide all the remaining stuff in your husband’s wardrobe.
…and don’t say anything about it. When your husband prepares to leave, he’ll “discover” all this stuff that you’ve cleverly hid, and he’ll have to get it back with him. They key is to make sure he discovers the hidden stuff only *after* you’ve already gone.

I can assure you, this strategy works *really* well in real life. Just ask my wife. And in case you’re worried about the husband, don’t be. He’ll only have to throw away all his clothes to make room for all your stuff, but that’s just collateral damage. Everything is fair in Love and War. Especially fair if it’s both.

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